This old British man is standing behind me on line at the local Post Office today, a growly guy who looks like he might have thrown a few grenades during WWII. At last it's his turn and he tells the clerk: "Aw need a passport renewal form!" The clerk's face lights up with that delighted look civil servants get when they know they're about to disappoint you. "You have to go to the main Post Office," he tells the old man, who snarls: "You wasted my bloody time!" - and walks out with a copy of the Daily Mail under his arm. "Sir!" the clerk calls out, "aren't you going to pay for that newspaper? Sir!!" The old guy ignores him and waddles out the door. Probably history's slowest getaway, and nobody stopped him. You go, old man!